I've worn my hair permed in junior high school. It was easier to manage but I noticed that much of my hair had broken off. I vowed to never get a perm after graduating from junior high school.

I continued to straighten it in high school and occasionally I'd wear braids. Braids seemed to be too tight and the hair around the edges was thinning. So I just straightened and wore it either down or in a ponytail.

Near the end of high school, my hair was okay. It wasn't spectacular to me. Around my freshmen year of college I experimented with different colors..from red in my honey blond highlights to purple to huge, chunky highlights of honey blond. I even cut bangs in it and while I thought it looked great, it was too hard to keep the shape and style not to include the level of moisture. My hair was completely fried from using a hot comb and flat iron to straighten it every day. Not just a few times a week but DAILY. Sometimes, TWICE a day if I was going somewhere and needed a touch up. The tiniest amount of moisture would make my hair poofy and frizzier near the roots.

Althought I'd gotten trims and cut off much of my permed hair from 8th grade, my hair had been trained to be straight. In college I didn't wear my hair curly as much because of this trained effect. It would be a little stringy in different areas eventhought it had been over 5 years since I'd last had a perm.

In October of 2004 I decided I wanted to try two strand twists with added hair. I had a friend do them for me and then later on I learned how to do them on my own and re-did them myself keeping the style until March. When I took them out in March I was astonished at how pretty my hair was. I guess I never saw it in that light before. I had this really nice twist out and could never keep my hands off it.

Fast forward to today. It's now May 2005. I've been natural for a year and 2 months. My hair has grown quite a bit. It's not dry, it's not fried. I have to actually search for split ends. It's stronger and not at all difficult to manage. I learned about a site called nappturality.com and found so many hair tips and so many wonderful hair albums to browse and gain information from. I feel so much prettier with my hair in it's natural state. I have friends who love my hair poofy and curly, so the support is great.

It's not easy to stand tall with African American natural hair. We've been told that our hair is nappy (in a negative fashion), dirty, and of course ugly. We've always straightened it because that's just what you did with it. It had to be tamed and controlled. Years ago I would never be seen with my hair just washed. That was just insane. I'd plan what day I'd be able to do my hair because I knew I'd need atleast 2-3 hours to wash, blow dry, press, and flat iron my hair. I'm glad I no longer feel that way or take that much time to do my hair. I love playing in my hair and experimenting with different styles. It's amazing how much I can do with it.

It took me a while but I finally questioned why I striaghten my hair and asked myself how I could be into natural living if I couldn't even wear my hair naturally. It made sense to me and I plan on sticking with it. I don't knock others who want straight hair or perms, I just don't think anyone should be dependent on hundreds of dollars and a hair salon appointment that takes pretty much the whole day in order to feel secure and happy with herself. Variety is great but feeling as if you're ugly or not good enough for anyone (especially yourself) without a straightened and permed head of hair is just unfortunate. You should be happy with yourself, bottom line.